DON'T MISS A THING

UNDERSTANDING the FORCE in the ‘NOW’

Four decades ago, I attended a lecture by Dorothy Dinnerstein, where she eloquently discussed the ‘sexual arrangement between men and women and human malaise,’ highlighting the complex love-hate relationship that defines our existence. This experience reinforced my conviction that women deserve a rightful place in the organized aspects of human life. In the evolving discourse of feminist thought, Dinnerstein’s seminal work, The Mermaid and The Minotaur, carves a space alongside other critical perspectives that aim to redefine our understanding of ‘us.’ Today, I articulate this perspective with equal eloquence, emphasizing the promise of power that we, as women, embody—deeming ourselves as the ‘Women of Today – Everyday.’

Reflecting on our primary task of self-creation, we recognize that from infancy, every aspect of our lives either echoes a reminder of powerlessness or extends a promise of power. This assertion remains relevant today, even after Freud’s exploration of women’s connection with the world during childbirth, a time when separation begins. The subsequent division of rights, responsibilities, and privileges expands, fostering power and prowess, even as Dinnerstein notes that, at the core of this sexual arrangement, all humans are ‘mother-raised’. Her book is essential for understanding our current state as women, and it prompts me to declare:

“I am the woman of today, embodying masculine traits,
More potent than yesterday, empowered to support our mates
With superior intellect, I foster greatness in both man and woman,
The distinctions are clear, as are our intentions,
To be the force we are destined to be, In diverse visions and missions,
To generate, obliterate, motivate, and create,
Playful aggression to maintain boundaries,
As I subtly stitch together our species…”

My past has transcended the ‘She’ I once was, evolving into the ‘Me’ I am now.

QUESTIONS for CONTEMPLATION

With a sense of humor, I recognize the multitude of verses that have been composed and recited on this subject, prompting me to interview myself as a woman in today’s society. My past has transcended the ‘She’ I once was, evolving into the ‘Me’ I am now. My reflections on feminism’s progress, alongside observations of women and the broader world, reveal significant strides in our ability to enact change. For many who have identified as women in the past decade, these questions are likely to resonate:

Would you have liked to be a ‘man’ instead?
I am in equal parts – but wholly? NO!

How do you recognize female power?
Mostly, when I look at myself in a lighted mirror, being charged!

How do we look at women who exercise power?
Like Elisabeth 1 when she said, “I have the heart and the stomach of a King”!

How and why do the conventional definitions of power tend to exclude women?

What in your mind is a template of what a powerful woman might look like?

Speaking of ‘Girl Power’ at its finest and ancient, is it negotiable? Do you know what I mean?

SHIFTING for a BETTER FUTURE

Throughout history, men have exhibited an obsession with female power and gender dynamics, both in secret and now more openly. Nevertheless, it is women themselves who are increasingly becoming the custodians of an empowering institution they aspire to build. This development is notably reassuring, especially considering that women often excel in critical situations. However, a parallel concern arises regarding women’s support for one another. Throughout history, there have been unflattering examples of ‘male domain possessiveness,’ similar to image-building and a need for superiority within communities. Such behaviors may appear petty, yet they persist in certain circles and require the guidance of more enlightened women, mentors, and peers to shift mindsets. I wanted to make this a point in case as I often find myself in a position to mentor younger women on these obsessions.

The preceding questions were addressed as if I were participating in an interview, as the responses to the remaining questions would likely lead to lengthy discussions. Nevertheless, I included them for future contemplation. Had the questions been reversed for the male arrangement of ‘manly views,’ answering would NOT have been interrupted, challenged, disagreed upon, silenced, attacked, or even seen as incompetent—like they say, until a man is otherwise proven, there remains the ‘authority gap’!

The WOMEN of Today

Today’s women, in their charming and dynamic ways, are increasingly aware of the necessity to assert their identities and emphasize their contributions to societal change. This change aims to challenge authority gaps, gender arrangements, hedonistic governance, preconceived notions, and collaborative decisions within their communities, and homes. The women of today are indeed the women of tomorrow, working towards establishing a reality for our society that, when empowered to lead the world, will adapt, elevate, and transform our planet according to its needs, and then some!

Often, I have been asked, “OK, so what should women do”? However, it is not women we need to fix, right? rather it is about transforming perceptions, responses, and interactions surrounding women in order to effect meaningful change in the world. On a very doable note, I envision myself as the only Woman on the shortlist and making my candidacy 79 percent more advantageous than that of any male candidate on the same list. This perspective reflects the current position of women, who are actively engaging on the front lines to excel and thrive, fly on their angelic wings, sprinkle the natural fairy dust, and ultimately contributing to a more flourishing society. Amen!

(Many thanks to my spectacular, illustrious women compatriots, whose thoughts and views I have expanded on here.)

Seema Azharuddin
March 8, 2025

About the Author

Seema Azharuddin is a published writer in both the United States and India. A Margaret Atwood quote is her mantra, “A word after a word after a word is power.” Lifting her readers to the power of the word is her narrative storytelling style. You can reach out to her at seemablanche@gmail.com and read more of her beautiful words here!