DON'T MISS A THING

At Love Happens Magazine, we believe in the power of women lifting each other up. Through our Empowered Women Empower series, we celebrate remarkable women whose strength and passion inspire us. Few embody this more than Iris Dankner—interior designer, philanthropist, breast cancer survivor, and founder of Holiday House, a leading design event supporting breast cancer research and awareness.

When Janet Morais, founder of LH, and I had the opportunity to interview Iris, it was a special moment for us. Iris’ story is a testament to resilience, creativity, and the power of using one’s passion to make a difference. We are honored to share her journey and amplify her mission of awareness, empowerment, and design. Since we talked forever, we had to cut some parts out, but we kept the best stuff!

Meet Iris Dankner, the Woman Behind Holiday House, the Powerful Breast Cancer Fundraising Showhouse

Janet & Anna: As our name and the tagline of LH’s publisher, KOKET, denote, at Love Happens Mag, we are firm believers that you cannot achieve any level of success without love. When did your love affair with design begin?

Iris Dankner: My love affair with design began when I was a little girl. I have a brother and a sister. They are both doctors, and they were always studying, and I was always in my room, moving my furniture, redesigning my room, telling my mother I liked it much better this way. So from an early, early age. I haven’t always been in the interior design world, but I have always been surrounded by art.

J&A: Tell us a bit about your past and what led up to the founding of your interior design firm, Iris Designs by Iris Dankner.

Iris: I was always an artist in high school and did everything with my art—even got through humanities by doing an art project. I went to college at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh as an art major focusing on printmaking and photography. It was fabulous. They taught me everything except what to do after graduation. It was a different time. 

After school, I moved back to New York and got a one-day freelance job at Lord & Taylor. And that day led to a week, led to a month. I was doing layouts by hand—it was way before computers. We specified the type and sketched everything manually. My handwriting is the exact same as the Lord & Taylor logo, and soon I was doing the logo on every ad that went out of the New York store, covering 48 locations. That handwriting is still the logo today.

I stayed for about 15 years. When Lord & Taylor was bought out, the entire creative team moved over to Ann Taylor. Around then, I had just had my second baby and decided to take some time off. It took two days before I realized quickly I hated being home doing nothing. I went back to school for interior design, and that’s how Iris Designs was born. I was 38.

J&A: What inspired the creation of Holiday House?

Iris: At 40, I was diagnosed with breast cancer at my first routine mammogram. It rocked my world. I had two young daughters and needed to go through treatment and a mastectomy. Fundraising became my way to help my family—to heal. Back then, nobody, I say nobody, talked about breast cancer. It was something that was whispered. There weren’t support groups or easy connections. It was a lonely place to be. 

I started a fundraising team called Iris’ Bosom Buddies with Susan G. Komen. I wanted to teach my daughters that they didn’t have to be embarrassed by what I went through. That it’s something we could talk about and help other young women. Because I was diagnosed so early, and that’s what saved my life. If women aren’t comfortable with their bodies, no one’s gonna do self-exams. Nobody’s gonna go for their mammograms. 

Soon, I was chairing New York’s Race for the Cure. And I did that for three or four years. Then, I was invited to the Race for the Cure in Egypt. The race there was between the Sphinx and the Pyramid. I asked Nancy Brinker why they hadn’t done Israel first. She said, “You wanna do Israel? Go for it.” So I did. I spent the next year in Israel, doing all the permitting and working with the Knesset. We turned the wall pink. 

By then, I had two full-time jobs: running my design firm and being a full-time philanthropist. That’s when I knew I had to combine my two passions. One day, I told my husband, “I have an idea.” He rolled his eyes. So, I did it anyway.

The first Holiday House was in 2008. I begged people to help me and support me, and they did. The good news is everybody wants to help; the bad news is everyone has been touched by cancer in some way, whether it is themselves, a loved one, or in memory of a loved one. So, people in the design community were really incredible and helped me get started. Over the years, it just took off.

J&A: Where was the first Holiday House?

Iris: The first Holiday House was in New York City. It was in this mansion right off Fifth Avenue—63rd and Fifth—owned by the Blavatniks. It was this old, old mansion that had been used as a boys’ school for a few years. I remember there were still old computers inside with wiring running along the walls. The Blavatniks made a donation and let me use it. It takes about a month, maybe six weeks to set up the space, to get it ready, then to be open for a few weeks, and then to take it down, it takes about two days. It’s crazy. So that’s where it started. We held it there at that same house for about 10 years.

I remember the economy crashed the month before the first event. It was 2008. We opened at the end of October, and that happened in mid-September. Nobody was even going out of their houses. I mean, I was petrified, but we did it. We broke even, which, for a first-time event, was good. So that’s what I remember about the first year.

Do you have a favorite Holiday House event? Or perhaps just a most memorable?

I have favorite rooms and a few favorite years. There was a Thanksgiving room done by Charles Pavarini. Amy Lau did the room where Baccarat celebrated its 250,000th anniversary. We also had the ultimate man cave done by Ali Couture, which was incredible. There was one house out in the Hamptons that had a tennis court on the roof, so we wrote to Venus Williams asking her to come, and she said yes. We had a cocktail party with her, and it was amazing. I heard Christian Siriano was opening and developing a furniture line, so one year, we reached out to him, and he said yes. When you get these yeses, it’s beyond! So he did two incredible rooms.

J&A: How do you decide what house to use for each event?

Iris: I would probably say that’s the most challenging part of this whole venture. You give me a house; I can do anything. But it’s getting somebody to loan you the space, that’s hard. We don’t have the funds because we’re a 501(c)(3), so we’re not paying anyone. A perfect example is the position I was in when planning our upcoming Summer 2025 showhouse. I knew I wanted to do a showhouse in the Hamptons this summer, as I’ve done in the past, but when it came to planning in March, nobody wanted to give up their home. They were all in a mindset to sell.  

I never have long to wait; once I get a house, I need 20 designers and all the different brands. Then you start hearing, oh, we’ve already allocated our funds. You should have called us earlier, but I can’t really call you early before I have a house. And some people say, well, you can start lining people up. It’s a lot of moving pieces, and that’s the hardest part. 

What we usually do is write to every broker and builder. We’ve been lucky so far, sometimes it’s a new build, which is easier for designers. Other times it’s an older home, which can be more of a challenge, but it’s interesting and different.

J&A: How are the designers selected?

Iris: For the designers, I love new and young names, but you have to balance that with A-list designers. When I first got started, it was all about press. We always had a magazine covering us, and that was a big draw. That changed with Instagram and Facebook—designers don’t wait to post. Magazines didn’t want anybody posting their room until it was published by them. And designers were like, “I’m not waiting. If everybody’s posting their room, I’m gonna post my room.” So it’s been a funny change. 

So we stay in the loop. We watch for brands launching new collections—paint lines, lighting, furniture. What designers are designing their own furniture that want to launch their line. Or a new website that’s coming. So, we start doing our due diligence to understand what’s happening in the industry. I follow trends. I always make it my business to go to the world’s top design fairs, like Maison et Object in Paris.

J&A: How does Holiday House empower?

Iris: Holiday House really empowers designers. Doing a show house is so personal. There have been times I’ve had to do rooms. Like I always say, management has to step up when someone backs out, or we have an extra room. The good news is you get to design a room without anyone telling you what to do. So that’s the bonus. But it’s also all about you and your design. So it’s really like a coming out. To stand in a room while people are criticizing it. They don’t know you’re the designer. “I love that,” “I hate that,” “Who lives here?” So, I think designers learn a lot. I think it especially empowers young designers. Working with me, I always try to remind them not to worry and that I am here to help. Then, by the end of it, you feel like you can do anything.

J&A: What empowers you?

Iris: Oh, a day like today, when somebody wants to interview me. I still kind of feel like, ‘What did I do?’ I was just doing what I could to help myself just survive. That’s how I got started. And then sometimes it’s hard to take that in, I mean, I just did it.

J&A: What do you consider your greatest achievement, either personal or professional?

Iris: My two daughters and five grandchildren. Beyond my greatest creations of all time.

J&A: If you could give one bit of advice to your younger self, what would it be?

Iris: It’s interesting because I was at my 50th high school reunion yesterday, and I went to sleep thinking, ‘I wish I had more self-confidence when I was younger and didn’t take everything so seriously.’ It’s really a tricky spot for young women. I remember my high school guidance counselor gave me the book “How to Be Your Own Best Friend.” And he said, “Nobody’s gonna love you unless you love yourself.” And there’s a lot to love there. Also, I would tell myself to keep my sense of humor.

J&A: Do you have any mottos or favorite quotes you like to live by?

Iris: I take a lot of my dad’s. His favorite motto is “The best is yet to come.” He still believes in it. When I was standing up on the podium for the recent Holiday House Palm Beach Table Top event, looking at this sea of beautiful people and everybody there for the same course, I thought to myself, “Daddy, you’re right, still to come. It’s still coming.”

He also taught me to just say, “So what? Don’t sweat the small stuff.” And I think that’s true. I had a mom who had a tendency to overthink, and my dad was the opposite. Another one is, I believe in dreaming big. I tell this to young women: if you have an idea, no matter if your husband rolls his eyes, if you believe in it, go for it. There’s no dream that’s too big. Even if you fail. So you tried. Go for it.

J&A: What’s next for Iris Dankner, and for Holiday House?

Iris: It’s so funny because also coming off the reunion, where everyone’s down here in Florida, and everybody’s retired, and I’m like, “wait, I feel like I’ve just figured it out.” So, what’s next? I just want to keep going, keep saving lives. If I save one life in a room each time I speak and talk about how important early detection is, that makes it all worth it. 

We are looking forward to our Hamptons showhouse opening on July 12th, and we are looking for a house for next fall in New York. We’re also thinking about a new office space in Palm Beach because we’ve outgrown ours. Trying to work it all out, do we keep it? Where is it? Do we go bigger? I don’t know if we can.

Some of my fantasies about Holiday House would be a holiday house in Paris during Maison et Object. Another item on the Holiday House dream list is to do it in LA. So, more to come!

Find out more about Iris Dankner and the Holiday House at holidayhousenyc.com.

Interview by Janet Morais & Anna Beck | Copy Editing by Daisy Simpson
Feature Image: Iris Dankner in a Holiday House Living Room Design by Jasmine Lam

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